Sorry, while I am proud to be a post-op woman with her HBS cured, I do not nor will not take part in any so called "Pride" event which is associated with homosexuality and "gay" rights. I am tired of having to explain that "NO, just because I am/was Transsexual does NOT mean I am a homosexual" yet in the pride events what is it that the "standard" person sees but a bunch of transgenders and other marching along with the GLB's and "leather boys" and simulated sex acts, etc. I steer clear of those events. Do I favour Non-discrimination ? You Bet !!, what ever gender presentation, or sexual proclivity or colour too but as a HBS person, not as a member of some GLBT "umbrella" which has so often used us as a bargaining chip and found excuses why we should NOT be included.

Pamela

TS-Si is a mainstream moderate organization, working both sides of the political and social aisle. Capital Pride, as the name implies, is held in our nation's capital in sight of the capital building (at one end of the festival). The festival starts down by the Navy Memorial and works its way past various government buildings.

99% of Capital Pride is family oriented and corporate sponsored, attended by gay and lesbian families as well as straight families. There will be hundreds of young teenagers, curious about their sexuality, who will come by the TS-Si booth to ask questions or take our brochures. TS-Si presence at the festival provides a visible counterweight to urban legends, media news bites, and gaudy, outlandish young gay men and transvestites.

Just as American Express, Showtime, Bank of America -- the entirety of corporate America -- and government employee groups are there, TS-Si is the voice of science and reason admidst the sometimes carnival atmosphere. We are the ones that congressmen and senators come to when they wish to understand the difference between Harry Benjamin Syndrome, transgender political activism, and the weekend crossdressers.

Shunning the historical public relationship between the gay community and HBS men and women denies reality and serves only to keep HBS closeted out of view (ceding the public discourse to the transgenders and crossdressers). Besides, being homosexual is no more sinful than being HBS. God, if you believe in one, loves us all.

All politics is local; so too in Metropolitan Washington. Our local politicians include the President, his administration, the Speaker of the House, and the entire U. S. Senate and Congressmen. They are here. TS-Si is here, engaging them all in conversation.

We could no more be silent than we could deny we were born with HBS.

A voice of reason, once again. Thank you so much for being here and raising the bloody dialogue. You folks are the best and just get better.

You are so far above the typical websites (TS, trannie, GL, etc.) that those kinds of visitors must get nosebleeds, only to find out that no, they do not have a clue.

And Pamela, we are a married heterosexual couple. Elissa has HBS history but we both still look back and care. We love our homosexual and transgender neighbots. And yes, it is a pain to see HBS mixed up with sexual orientation and and cross-dressing stuff. But unless we support those who lead in positive directions how can we make any progress at all?

If it wasnt for TS-Si out there doing the right thing we would have no hope at all.

Elissa and Ray

Ray, I too was married and my husband, although he knew of my past, did not wish to deal with my past and would have preferred we simply ignore it.

I did not have any tg or gay friends (had a few ts friends I met in NYC) so in that regard I never had to contend with the political stuff that obviously was in the developmental stages while I was living my life with my husband in North Carolina and working to get ahead. I wonder how you and Elissa deal with her past and if it comes to the forefront at times in a bothersome way?

My husband made it clear to me that he wanted nothing to do with my past. As far as he was concerned I was a woman and his wife and that was it. Sort of comforted me but then I did miss the interaction with others who had gone through what I did. Can't erase history can we?

Diane

It's all very well to talk of comming out and showing the world the kind of people we really are and no doubt there are some who may be quite happy so to do. Good luck to them and you have my respect.

Despite my knowledge that I am female although I had male sex organs at the tender age of 14 my Motrher wanted to take me to doctors to get me fixed. Not to correct the male defect but to correct my belief in my female sex identity. While I conformed to the desires of my parents all was well. As soon as Ii asserted my female status I was beaten and beaten severely.

Admittedly these were the early 1960's and today things are different. Or are they? Today we have the likes of Ken Zucker advocating 'positive reinforcement" of the masculine in order to "cure" boys of believing they are female. How? by taking away their toys of choice and allowing only masculine ones. Also by preventing playmates of choice and allowing the child only to play with other boys. This list of cruel brainwashing is done in the name of medical science. Alongside the beatings this was the kind of thing my parents inflicted on me. The moment I stood my ground in adulthood and took positive steps to correct natures mistake, I was ordered out of the house told never to come back. My sister did the same. Every so called friend I had (save one gay friend)Shunned me and my once blossoming career ended abruptly. This isolation very nearly ended my life.

Since correction and starting my life over again I started out by comming out to lovers when the relationship looked like heading down the aisle. Without exception the relationship was ended not abruptly but died the death of a thousand cuts oh so slowly. The poison of the knowledge too much for the relationship. Eventually I learned my lesson and kept my medical history to myself. And now many years on I have a normal suburban life and no-one knows my past and I mean not one single person.

So someone please explain to me exactly what I have to gain by repeating the mistakes of the past and suddenly telling everyone? Because I cannot think of a single advantage. Not one. Will my revelation to the world change their view of HBS women and men. I don't think so. All I would be doing is what drag artists do at the end of their act and that is whip off the wig and in effect say "There you are I'm really a man I fooled you all didn't I?" No Lisa you are right on so many issues but on this one you are way off beam. Well written and a well organised essay. But wrong wrong wrong.

Throughout my life, I have believed that I will come out on top. My Catholic education taught me that each one of us can make a difference. I believe that with every cell in my body.

If I thought none of this mattered -- that I couldn't change anything -- if I really thought it impossible to make gentle the life of this world, I would end it now.

But everytime I have failed at something, everytime someone has tried to put me down or tell me I couldn't do what I want to do, I have gotten back up and continued trying.

TS-Si is successful beyound our wildest dreams. We are in correspondence with scientists and researchers around the world, exchanging information, suggesting courses of study, areas that need more research. They listen to us, we listen to them and engage them in dialog, challenge their conclusions, point out implications of their research.

Our readers and our correspondence includes local and national politicians who ask our advice, solicit our opinions. We are not a loud, public organization looking for media coverage and publicity -- we prefer to work the backrooms and the hallways and leverage our knowledge and our contacts to work towards our goals.

We do not expect, nor do we want, public recognition when changes to policy and laws occur that facilitate HBS medical treatment, transition support, and legal recognition. There are dozens of organizations who will leap in the media spotlight to claim credit for what we will have accomplished. Fine. We don't care who takes credit or who the academic histories say accomplished what. Sharon and I will know when we breathe our last and that will be enough.

In my private life, men who have known my history have proposed to me as have women. I have never hidden who I am. I expected that, after transition, I would remarry.

And in the end, I married the brightest, smartest, most beautiful woman I have ever known.

All of us are different but as the Christophers have said "It is better the light one candle than curse the darkness." I have spent my life light candles and have no intention of ever stopping.

Our editorial did not address stealth per se. In fact, we at TS-Si fully understand the need for privacy and fight to protect it at all times. In fact, some of our participants and many of our correspondents have faced circumstances such as yours.

We have articulated and reinforced our privacy policy any number of times.

Speaking for both TS-Si and the TS-Si.org editorial board, our call to come out does not bring preconditions as to what that means in practice. We all - no matter what our situation - have something to offer. It starts with shared experience, as you have done, and may even end there. For others, it may extend to varying degrees of public exposure. It is all good.

We welcome you and everyone else and do so without reservation.

Bless you,

Sharon S. Gaughan
VP, TS-Si
Managing Editor, TS-Si.org

Evangeline, I don't get you. I'm not a fan of Pride marches. I agree with Pamela that they give everybody the impression that we're all variations of homsexuality. I've people tell me this (as I'm sure many of us have). To say that it's tiring to tell people for the umpteenth time that "NO, I'm not a kissing cousin to Mr. Leatherboy over there," is putting it mildly.

BUT, you have to do something Evangelina. I know you believe that by hiding in the background, and that just by being like everybody else, people will suddenly/magically believe that "hey people with HBS are just pretty much just your average everyday people!" But, that just isn't the case. Human nature is to ignore the invisible. If we're invisible, and all people see are the highly visible goofballs, who proclaim themselves as having HBS (in spite of the fact that they aren't even remotely close to having HBS), who are John & Jane Q Public going to associate having HBS with? Why the goofballs of course.

I'm not not a fan of being out and proud. I was forced to be very out in my last job, when I was transitioning (although I tried to stay stealth outside of work). It was NO fun. If I had a 5 cents for every time I had a coworker tell me they saw a show on the Discovery Channel (which I myself had seen, and cringed at) and thought of me, I'd be a millionare. I won't even go into the story of the person who worked where I worked, and publicly outed me in a store, where he was working part time. No, I don't advocate being out and proud, but there are things you can do, that don't put you in the spotlight, yet clearly state that "hey HBS is not the same as being gay, lesbian, or TG." I don't 100% approve of TS-Si doing the Pride 2008 thing, but at least it's something, mainly because there are going to be some mainstream people there, to pass the message on to. BTW, even the average HBSers can speak out in some way, via e-mails, posts etc., to pass along that TG is not the same as HBS, and it is NOT some twist on sexual orientation.

Just my 2 cents worth,
Ellen

Trensgenders, do not insult Jesus Christ and God the Father by wearing clothes and adornments that intentionally misrepresent your sex for the purpose of immoral deception. If you dress as a man or woman to make yourself and others think you are the opposite sex, you sin against God.

You reject who God made you to be and deceive God's children. You say "God, you made me a man but I resent and reject who you made me to be so I rebel and represent myself as the opposite sex".

Don't misuse God's grace to justify your sin. Listen to Paul, who warns against this very thing. Colossians commands us to flee from sexual immorality and be pure. Sexual immorality is clearly defined in the Bible.

A loving member of the Family Research Council
http://www.frc.org/

I don't believe Jesus ever addressed the subject of HBS men or women but he did cure those who had physical, medical conditions such as Harry Benjamin Syndrome. Who am I to question his works.

Likewise, I don't remember Jesus saying a single word about transgenders or crossdressers, but I do know that he had a documented fondness for prostitutes and personally asked married men to leave their wives and children and come hang with him in his posse.

Jesus certainly didn't build himself a physical church and an ecclesiastical hierarchy to run it.

But he did say, probably numerous times, that he who is without sin should cast the first stone -- so I guess the previous poster must have been immaculately conceived.

God may strike me dead if anything I have written here is untrue but so far he has seemed to agree with me.

Next subject please.

So this "Loving Member of the Family Research Council" thinks that the genitalia God put between our legs is what makes us male or female, and that by saying that is not what we are that we are rejecting God-- How Sad and how little understanding of God and the Bible this poor judgemental person has. The original story of Adam and Eve says that God took EVE the woman from within Adam the man which to me would imply that "Adam" as created contained both male and female and because God made us in "His" image, God must therefore contain both male and female within.
The second mistake this poor misguided soul makes is that we do this for purposes of "immoral deception" and "intentionally" misrepresent who we are. How sad and then this self appointed judge decides for God that we are SINNING against God; I assume of course that God has been whispering in her ear about this as she has been appointed HIS spokes person.
Sorry, but Paul was NOT speaking about us and to try and shape his words to suit your misguided view of things is the real sin.Sorry to disappoint you Margaret Lovett Grubaker, but I'm asexual and that hardly falls under ANY definition of "Sexual Immorality"; for your information, God and Christ very clearly point out that those who would judge others commit the biggest sin of all, but then you are too Self-Righteous to admit that to yourself, so you just run around condemning others as sinners.
Pamela, a Preachers kid, a former church member and a former student in a Christian University-- in a word, biblically knowledgeable.

To be part of a 'Pride' event and allow your overall birth condition be connected to that of glbt pride says nothing to the public but that we are no different than a transgender and part of that construct. That is the message those on the outside see and not one I would convey.