Springfield, VA, USA. Transgender is like a ride in an amusement park. If you board the ride, you think it's real because that's the way our minds work. The ride goes up and down and round and round with thrills and chills beneath brightly colored lights that flash on and off and on and off. Some people have been on the ride for a very, very long time and never question "Is this real, or is this just a ride?" Transgenders can understand everything except people who don't understand them.

Transgenderism is just one big phone company with an extra closet full of clothes. No matter who you talk to, or how many different transgenders you meet, nothing ever changes. It's like voice mail. You never get an answer to your question. No matter how many buttons you push, it's always the same friggin song and dance: my way, or the highway. They haven't had an original idea or tried anything new since Moses tied his ass to a tree.

 

And whatever you do, don't ever ask them if they would like to rearrange the furniture. They like their furniture just the way it is.

 

If something about the human body disgusts you, I would think you would complain to the manufacturer and then go see a surgeon. The transgenders prefer to whine about how unfair life is, especially to them.

 

Of course life is unfair. Fair only happens on television. If Jesus had been transgendered, Catholic school children would be wearing lipstick cases around their necks now instead of crosses. Complaining that life is unfair is the intellectual equivalent of jerking off.

Either do something about it or get off the pot and there had better not be any sticky crud left on the computer keys again.

 

The only thing that could possibly be worse than a transgendered person is a liberal one drunk on the kool-aid. Liberals will buy anything a transgender writes because they think it screws up the conservatives and whatever screws up the conservatives must be good for America.

 

A liberal would never think to ask

because they are too busy making excuses for everyone's bad behavior.

And I'm tired of all this liberal bonding and backslapping: 

It's like a viral video in designer heels.

 

The transgender philosophy – and transgender has a philosophy in same way that George W. Bush has a philosophy -- has a built-in defense system: anything or anyone that questions a transgender belief, no matter how logical the argument may be, is declared the product of the white heterosexual patriarchy that is trying to oppress them. They have nothing new to offer and there is nothing sadder than an old transgender sitting before a mirror.

Once you've seen one crossdresser in the basement, there's nothing much left to do except move on. There's nothing new, nothing earth shaking, and if you return the next day or a month from now to check on them, they'll still be in the basement.

 

Crossdressers are like dogs that keep coming back looking for approval. You can't get rid of them. No matter what you say or do, they keep coming back asking for your blessing like you were their parent or something.

HBS, on the other hand, Harry Benjamin men and women, are like cats. Yell at an HBS man or woman one time, just one time

and they're gone. Out the door. They don't need this crap.

 

And never, NEVER, say anything if an HBS woman asks

If a crossdresser asks the same question, you can answer, of course, 'cause if you do say yes, they'll just ask you to tighten their corset a few notches or more.

 

You know, if crossdressers could blow themselves, they would never ever leave their rooms. Never. The bars would be empty, public bathrooms would be segregated by male and female, and all the girls on the street would always have vaginas and no hidden surprises.

 

---

 

Author's note. Much thanks to

 

Lenny Bruce (1925–1966) and William Melvin "Bill" Hicks (1961–1994).

 

 

 

 

 

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